Te Soñe Por Ultima Vez

Desperté con el

sonido que hace la barra de acero

cuando abren el portón de enfrente.

Y salieron a borbotones

Desesperadas y libres las lagrimas que

Resguarde para días mas tristes.

 

Te extrañé teniéndote

Enfrente.

Justo, ahí, sonriente

Con ojos dulces

Adorándome

Escuche tu voz y su canción

Que me calma

acunándome en lo

profundo de tu brazo fuerte.

 

Me hiciste mil preguntas

Y me reserve algunas contestaciones

Te regale mis labios en la sonrisa que dibujaste

Con detalle.

 

No bailaste conmigo, como te suplique

Pero tus ojos danzaban con el vals

De mi risa y tu corazón

Giraba sus caderas

al son del merengue

que es nuestro amor.

 

Te quise todo

Y tanto

No quería dejarte ir.

Pero ya era hora.

 

Anoche tuvimos nuestra ultima cita.

Fue todo lo que quise

Todo lo que soné.

Te dije adiós con el sonido de la barra de acero

Que cierra el portón de enfrente.

Y a borbotones salieron libres las lagrimas

Que guarde para hacer el duelo

De tu ausencia que tanto me cuesta…

 

©Teresita Matos-Post

14 de mayo del 2017

Totowa, NJ

“Después que te soñé por ultima vez”

Before Us, Eden

One day when I can no longer go on

this is what I want to say

to new friends:

 

“I am back from the fields

I’ve spent there the best of my years

Where I’ve been

What I’ve seen and heard

And the lives that toiled

Next to mine

I have no doubt

That something great is emerging

There Right now,

Donde las lagrimas de nuestra abuelas

Rociaron el jardin

Como oleo de oraciones

Que aun no tienen respuesta

Donde los pellejitos de mi abuelo

Abonaron la tierra

Alimentando las semillas sembradas por

Amables desonocidos sin nombre.

 

If your heart is beating as strong as mine

It is possible

That you are considering

Joining the teams on the field

Eden is before us

As close as the aire

that speaks truth

at times nodding our heads in doubt

dudando

Que el jardin en que sonamos

Sea tan solo un espejismo

A modo de escapismo

Una vil trampa para no

Molestarnos con lo imposible

De la carga

Amarga

Que es disenar mundos

Que salven vidas

repletos de sol y frutos.

 

Y no te voy a mentir

Pintando paisajes edenicos

I am not going to spare you the details

I thought I would not make it back alive

But I’m back,

And the fields

thank God

behind me

but Eden is still before me…

The work

was vigorous strenuous

At times vile and hard

I went there to dig out hope

And in turn I had to dig deeper

Pulling out these scars

Porque de esperanza nunca hay suficiente

Por eso jamas se acaba

Fui a hacer algo bueno

Y Nuevo

I had a vision of dreams

creations we never knew

we’ve Never seen

I went to the field to join in teams

and I must confess at times

you will not know what this work means

there were moments

when confused, tired and abused

I could not grasp the vision

what is this,

that we are building?

 

I am not sure if I was there to succeed

But in the succession

I give you my tools

Because even in the haze

It’s my confession

Even when we feel as fools

it’s been worth it

Go on

continue without me…

Here are the blue prints

Plans and strategies

Tried and true

The wheel has been invented

No analysis is due

Solo usala y echala a rodar

Eden esta en frente

A la vuelta dela esquina

Llena de promesas sin cosechar

y en el espejo de sus claras aguas

Vemos la vida que fluye majestuosa

Bendecida y sin precio

Y si la matas llamandola Utopia

As true as it maybe

Eden is before

fine as fine a vision can be.

 

Before us Eden

And behind us we leave

The fields of

Loneliness

Hopelessness

Lovelessness

And the mean

Ways we deal

with each other

it’s a mess

The trouble we stir up

In vain furthering our pain.

 

I’m not gonna sugar coat it

I want to keep it real,

Vengo de regreso de los campos

no ha sido facil

la verdad

Es real la inversion

Sea lo que sea

Lo que con Dios estemos armando

Creando, con Dios inventando

Priceless it is,

it aint cheap

It has cost us an arm and a leg

y un ojo de la cara

cuando te lo pidan

te quitaras la capa

de las espaldas

you will for sure

do the turning of the cheek

many

times

over…

 

Because

What’s at stake

Eden before us

Behind we leave scars

From the battle

Of devising

And building

Resting on God

And dreaming

We’ve paved the way

Up to here

And where I stand

Before you today

As far as we’ve come

As much as we’ve done

Before us Eden

God is with you

As you press on…!

 

Spoken Word Poetry:  Before us Eden

AETH at Princeton Theological School

Oct. 12, 2016

“This for me was truly an honor and a moment of affirmation, as I was invited to present this spoken word as the prelude to Rev. Dr. Justo Gonzalez’ sermon that night.” -Tere

Angry

I’m a pacifist and I’m angry.

Those two terms are not mutually exclusive.

 

If you are a woman of color who has something to say

You have been accused of “being an angry person”

And being called angry is meant to call you out

To point out to a deficiency in your character.

This tactic is as old as the oppression of women

Especially women of color in America, meant to silence,

Mellow out, subdue, and crush our spirit.

And some of us have internalized that for far too long.

That being angry is a sin, when in fact more often than not

It is when we stand by, quietly, that we become accomplices

Of death, fear, and violence.

 

What we do with our anger can be sin;

but what we do not at the sight of injustice

can be more fatal.

 

But Alas!  We serve Jesus, who had no shame in his game,

he expressed his frustration,

And modeled for us what we are to do,

when fueled with holy anger, he

turned the tables of the moneychangers.

Money mongers, manipulators

And cheats…

 

Yea, I am angry

Not because I like to

Want to

Or need to

It is because

If I don’t

Im

Numb

And dumb

Or worst yet

I must have

lost my heart.

 

Yes, I am angry

I am mad at myself

That I let you see me

And the quiver

Of my upper lip

And the tremble of my knees

Shook the earth between us

And I hate

You saw that insolent tear

atrevida

Make its way

Near my lips

While I am Still

attempting to explain

Man-splain

In English plain

Why it is that we cry

Outloud

when we do

what is not right

it is not right

for far too long

we’ve kept it to ourselves.

 

Yes, I am angry

And no,

I do not let my hair down

I let my hair UP

Not as some crest

To intimidate ya’ll

The springs that jump of my head

Are not stinging coils

Meant to scare you away

They are not my defense mechanism.

But they are who I am.

Who I am

That is what seems

To really scare you.

 

We are angry, yes!

Because what we see

We know

It’s killing us.

And you want to call us out

Sitting us at the dugouts

As if something foul

Had been rotting

in our mouths

and our words spill out

from our souls

like self-inflicted curses

that dig deeper

the ditches

where we are supposed

to bury our dreams.

 

We know you see it.

Yes, we are angry

And we wonder why

Is taking you so long

To be angry too.

 

©Teresita Matos-Post, July 2017

Summer Music Institute

#BlackLivesMatter

Drew Theological School

Enfleshed Evil, Part 1

Creepy  Places

Photo Credit: ©Dyserè, 2015

I have indeed
Encountered evil
In the holiest of places.

Gnashing of teeth
Fueled by fear
By the faithful to a gospel
They personally
Not know yet.

Altars are lifted daily
To the gods of comfort
To the gods of power
To the gods of me and myself
To the gods of manipulation
And deceit.

The real altar’s veil
Was ripped
With edges stained in
Righteous blood
Healing and wholesome.
Ready to pour out milk and honey sweet as can be.

Yet their worship were rituals
For placing smoke curtains
to keep all doped in a haze of uncertainty and confusion.
Any one halfhearted mastermind of mediocrity
can shepherd half-living sheep
Who no longer know when
they Feed or thirst.

©Copyright 2016 by #ir-reverend















The Real Horror in Halloween
by Rev. Teresita Matos-Post
There was a time when Christian brothers and sisters in the faith in Jesus Christ had the respect of their communities.  When they called out the evils of the world, people would listen and follow suit.  Their word had authority.  In part, people could see in them the kind of authority that came from their transparency, compassion, mercy, and love.  When you encountered one of them healing would take place.  People’s lives were transformed.

Communities started to change with the development of commerce and technology.  Other voices started to exert authority and lure the hearts of the people, including the hearts of those who proclaimed Christ as their Savior.  The new culture embraced celebrations of other cultures, including some festivities that were said to have been off limits to the Christian community for so long.  All Hallows Eve, also known as Halloween, became just as popular as Christmas.  People loved dressing up in costumes and handing out candy to kids in their neighborhood.  A practice that seemed harmless, innocent, and at times beneficial, as it provided an opportunity to finally meet their neighbors. 

However, there were Christian groups who vehemently refused in participating in this evil celebration.  To them it was clear that to participate in this festivity, it was equal to worshipping the devil and its demons.  Because of their faith and fear of offending God they would abstain from celebrating Halloween.  Intellectually it made sense. At a biblical level, it was clear, because Halloween could be categorized under the ancient definition of “pagan celebrations” that scripture points as something God despises. Spiritually it was wise counsel.

Some God-fearing Christians would use technology to warn other Christians of the fatal mistake they were making in allowing their children to dress up for Halloween.  Out of love they would call out this evil, because their brothers’ and sisters’ salvation was at risk.  If they were to look the other way, there would be a judgement day, when Jesus himself, would hold them accountable for not saying something.  And that is a scary thing!

But not many seemed to listen or to care.  What was happening?

The God-fearing Christians decided they could not bear to see so many souls at the expense of the evil one.  Something had to be done. They gathered and decided to recruit a team of five spies, strong in the faith, gifted in the Spirit to infiltrate in the pagan activities that would take place that one night of the year.  They were to have conversations with the people to find out why they no longer took heed to their warnings.

Here are their findings:

TOP SECRET
SPY AGENT #001
LOCATION:  Urban Setting, Poorest City in New Jersey
OBJECTIVE: Gather information about the satanic practices taking place Halloween night.
INFORMANT:  Single mother of two girls.
FINDINGS:  The informant’s female children were dressed up as the popular princesses.  The mother reported how this activity would lift up the morale of the children.  Once a night they were princesses. For once they would benefit from the generosity of their neighbors.  They would be able to eat the brand of candy they could not afford.  The mother would save the surplus of candy to put a treat in their lunch boxes the rest of the year.  About the message of our brothers and sisters in Jesus Christ, the informant reported: “When we have been in dire need of food no one from that group have retuned our calls. In fact, we once visited their worship, and the preacher said the poor were poor because we did not work hard enough.  “Pull yourself by your bootstraps”, he said.  I work two jobs and still struggle to put food on the table.   I thought Jesus said to feed the hungry.  I know for a fact they feed themselves after worship.”

SPY AGENT #002
LOCATION:  Downtown Park
OBJECTIVE:  Why adults engage in Halloween?
INFORMANT:  Adult male dressed up with ragged clothes
FINDINGS:  Informant proceeded to clarify this is what he wears every day.  “I’ve been in this park for the last 6 months; What took you so long to speak to me?”

SPY AGENT #003
LOCATION:  Gas Station, Hipster Town USA.
OBJECTIVE:  Teenagers dressed up as zombies, why?
INFORMANT:  14-year-old male.
FINDINGS:  The informant was apprehensive to engage in conversation.  He reported most adults do not acknowledge him, let alone talk to him.  He reported that dressing up as a zombie allows him to fantasize about the possibility of immortality.  “No one can touch you.”  About the warning from his youth pastors about the danger in celebrating this night, he responded:  “I see evil every day, and I do not hear them talking about that.  I was supposed to be strong when my best friend died of an overdose; I was supposed to pray away my inclinations to kiss they boy I liked but nothing happened.  They told me God would heal my heart and help me get over my parent’s divorce.  When I said I was contemplating suicide, they shut down the conversation.  It seems that if I were to be okay with God I had to do all the work by myself.  They left me alone when I needed a family the most.”

SPY AGENT #004
LOCATION:  Emergency Room
OBJECTIVE:  How many are affected by the evils of this night.
INFORMANT:  ER Nurse
FINDINGS:  The informant was attending a young African American man with a gunshot wound.  He was found wearing a dark hoodie and a Jason mask. When asked about the relationship between Halloween and the horror this young man was enduring the informant responded: “This happens here every day, no one seems to care.  That is the horror.”

SPY AGENT #005
LOCATION:  Quiet Town USA
OBJECTIVE:  What older generations think about the evil of this festivity?
INFORMANT:  86-year-old female; widow
FINDINGS:  The informant responded: “It is the only night someone knocks at my door.”

When all the findings were gathered, the spies did not know what to report back to the God-fearing Christians.  They were still convinced that celebrating Halloween was evil.  But they certainly heard their neighbors’ stories and could not find evil in them.  What they did find was a deep void in their own hearts, and how profound the need was in their community.  Needs they were unaware of.  How did they become so disconnected?  They decided it was important to share their findings with their leaders.  Something must be done.

One night all the elders, pastors, deacons, lay members, teachers, and evangelists gathered to hear the spies’ report.  The God-fearing group listened intently.  Some gasped, others nodded.  In the end, one of the spies asked, “So, what do we do now?”

To his disappointment, the eldest and “wisest” of them all patted the one spy on the shoulder and in a deep sigh he responded: “Love the sinner, hate the sin. We will keep denouncing this evil festivity year after year.”  

Have a blessed All Hallows Eve and let us remember all the saints who gave their lives to be in mission with the disenfranchised, by becoming one with them.